The the australian's have left, so this is my first night here by myself.
Its the first time living in the hostel by myself and pretty much in a massive
city by myself. So I guess its a time to learn things for myself. Just came back
from dinner by myself and seriously its hard to fully enjoy this city with other
people's company. I ended up having shisha but without friends it isn't the same.
I realise everything about shisha is about hanging around with people and just talking
shit. After talking to people after the hostel after the other guys left I sat down with a
bunch of random's ( that I had seen before) what happened to my lady. Made me think ,
I really can just me people for short term and suddenly forget about them. I guess people
can tell am a person who likes long term ties which isn't the case in this environment. I've always known this but after living like this all this time its hard to change the habit. So after the aussie left in the taxi and hostel owner could see right thru me and understood how upset I was to see my friends were going and asked me afterwards if I wanted to move in a different room. I told him yes at first and then realised that I couldn't be stuffed packing up and that I was also going to leave the next day. But for the moment there I didn't really know what to do and I hate that ..
By now I expect myself to deal better with the situation and not cause myself to feel like this. After losing half a lung from smoking and spending a fair bit money the whole thing was for nothing. Also now after gong up to my room by myself had to lock the door and just reflect where I am. I felt empty ,, but I got my arse down stairs and try to start again .. anwyasy people I know are here so I going to socialise ,, god i'm shit
ALso i've had a few to drink so this will not make sense ,, but its my little notes anywyas
posted by Luca @ 1:18 pm 5 comments
